Food

Warning: This is boring. Imagine that whiny girl who you don't ask out for a second date because you're too annoyed at her for counting the calories in her salad. That's me at this moment. Was that image sexist? Heck yes. Am I, too, a product of the patriarchy, of this media that turns women into sex objects yet condemns them for trying to be sexual? Yes. As Gloria Steinem said, our greatest task - both as men and women - is not to learn, but to unlearn. (Kudos to the Good Men Project for the quote - http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/yes-rape-victims-get-erections-too/ )

Ok, so:

I've been thinking about food a lot lately. This is strange for me- I am not usually a big eater, but here I have been munching away at bread and dreaming about protein (literally). I am wondering what's going on with my body, and am slightly worried. Of course, there is the cosmetic issue - I like myself at a certain weight and want to maintain that weight (breif interruption as I research Loeys Dietz Syndrome and drink OJ - no, not the Simpson). Part of it is just that I am confused - and like most humans, I prefer not to be.

Theories on newfound appetite:

1. I ate falafel twice last week when I was not hungry - this was out of a) desire to eat good falfel, which I haven't done since being here b) forcing myself to eat by myself in public, which for me is a big deal c) figured I'd give into it this one week and move one, type of deal.

But maybe my body got used to eating when I'm not hungry/got used to eating more and now is hungry more.

2. I've been living with carnivores, and have adapted to their carniverous ways.

3. I am spiritually unsatisfied and have too much free time. I should not have time to eat. In that case, I must fix my life. I think my lack of Torah study is somehow also tied up to my eating habits, not because of some esoteric beleif, but based on anecdotal evidence - I know from thinking back on phases in my life that when I study Torah more, I eat better. I can't explain it, but its true - kind of like how its a fact that every world cup I've been in Brazil for since I was born, Brazil's won - every one I've been in the US for, they've lost. I am trying to use this data to get Brazil to finance my vacation there in 2014, but so far my efforts have been unsuccessful.

4. I've been sick and indoors a lot - a slightly modified version of 3, because in this version, its not my fault.

I have been thinking a bit about Judaism's approach to food: I find the habit of making blessings before and after food to be productive, because it encourages mindful eating and grattitude, which I think are good things to have in one's life, whether one is religious or not. According to Ramban's interpretation of "Kedoshim tihiyu", "you shall be holy" (found somewhere in Leviticus), holiness means not being a "disgusting human being without violating any of the technical laws of the Torah", but of course, by using that description as an interpretation of "kedoshim tihiyu", he turns that "disgusting human being...." into a violation of a Torah law - that of being holy. One of the examples Ramban uses is that of eating excessively. How cool -years before psychologists explained to us how important our attitude and relationship to food is for our well-being, Ramban came along and said that having an unhealthy attitude towards food is inconducive to a spiritually healthy, self-fulfilled lifestyle.